Samadhi

I'm working on concentration and focus, goals in Christian thought and also focus or concentration in Theravada. I found a new venue for philosophy-meetup.com The group I joined was great but I overconcentrated and was a little stuck energy wise when I got home. Finally an ice cream sundae and a diet coke from MacDonald's got me unstuck. My Sangha talks about mundane meditations, such as cleaning or cooking and being concentrated. Also how evil can be very mindful. Interesting stuff. I bought Timothy Hogan's book on Kabballah from Amazon. The Sangha mentions the last 4 Janas which I'm interested in. They make me think that is what it is like to be dead or out of my body. Consciousness continues, I'm sure of it.

a writer finally

Today I went to the Tigard library and wrote and quoted Jung for about 45 mins. Then I went to get coffee at a place I like in LO. I talked to Gina and she wanted to process but I was done. I realize I'm finally learning to process on my own through journaling, quoting and writing and poetry. Adrianne took my desk to school so I set up her room as a meditation room. I put a Buddha and bell and candle on a table, put a comfy chair in there and a end table and lamp. Now I'm set. I did around 15 min meditation today and read from Bikku Bodi's book. Bruce says to bring your issues to your meditation sit. I did and it was interesting. Things are getting good. Why did it take me so long to get this? I could kick myself.

community

Gina says that we should be each others friends and family. If I am all that to all the women she wants me to support I will have no time or resources left for me. Its one thing talking or thinking about community, its another thing living it. I like feminist thinking but not taken this far in real life. There has to be a balance. Gina's view of community is too broad and too demanding. I don't love her that much and I don't love those others that much either. I guess I'm finally being honest about where I stand. I want to focus on myself and my own family, not help others too much. Its too much work, expense and I lose my center.

blogspot.com

I found a new blog I think I like from She Writes. It is by Dawn Potter. Also I'm in touch with the Portland Mufon people. Whet out to MacDonald's with Jeff. It's too exhausting to go out with him but I like him and will have him over for lunch and then we can talk. He knows a lot about UFO's and Bigfoot. I'm reading something by Lon Milo Duquette which is interesting on Tarot especially. I'm starting to get a little cold again, I think from the stress of being too social. This morning I'm going to try a very gentle yoga class and will go easy on the social stuff for the rest of the week.

Selling stuff

My New Year's Resolutions are to clean and organize my pantry, bedroom closet and the closet in my daughter's room. Also I want to have my friend Jennifer ( she offered ) teach me how to sell books on Amazon. If that is successful I may move on to Ebay. I have so many friends with so much stuff to sell and I could get a percentage. Also I want to do a gentle yoga class, walk and increase my stamina. I need to call Denise for coffee, call Jennifer, call Jeff and Minnie for lunch. Get my car tuned up and my teeth cleaned. And work on maintaining my energy through a variety of activities.